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The Lovely

Name Hikarii
Born on 02-24-90
Love Cheesecake
Dislike Vegetables

I totally forgot I had a Blogdrive account. Actually, one time I tried to log in was yeaars ago, and it didn't work, so I figured my account got deleted. After waking up one day with a bizarre dream I wanted to write about, I wondered where I could create a journal specifically for dreams.

Thus, I logged onto Blogdrive, and to my surprise, my account still works, despite all these years of never using my account. In any case, please enjoy yourself while you're here.


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Jul 24, 2012

I was in a movie theater or something and I think Tsubasa was sitting in a row or two in front of me and I WAS SERIOUSLY TRYING VERY HARD TO GET A LOOK AT HIS FACE so I was shifting around in my seat. I was hoping for him to turn around, but he was wearing sunglasses and had the cut from D&R 2009. The presentation ended, but I guess I realized it didn't so I waited for Tsubasa to come back but I guess he left. Q_Q

I was watching Tackey & Tsubasa dancing to DBSK's Why? Keep Your Head Down on Utaban on Youtube. Even though I set the quality to 480pp it was still blurry and I complained to my sister, "Tsubasa, why so quiet?!"

Then I looked at the comments and loved the fan replies, "Second best. :D" which was like a compliment.

Tsubasa had Koi Uta era hair. That's when I knew it was a dream. hahah.

Posted at 07:20 am by Hikarii
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Jul 9, 2012
Series of short dreams

I get a text message from my friend, S that she and B were going to hang out with me at the Paradium. I text them back (not using my phone) that I don't remember where that is, and proceed to wait for them to tell me. They didn't give me any word for a long time, so I decided to just google map the area. When I got to the place, which was sort of like a small mini-fair, the place seemed to be closing. Next thing I know, I'm hanging out with both S and B in a mall-like food court area close to the carnival-like area. I wanted to wash my hands, so I went to look for the restroom, but that took me an incredibly long time for some reason, because it seemed hours had passed. When I got out, I didn't expect to see anyone waiting for me, but then I saw my sister. I was so surprised to see her wait for me so long that I told her, "You could have just left. You didn't have to wait for me like that."

Maybe this dream was about how dependable my sister is sometimes, hahah.

The items I chucked in my Leopets gallery were all returned but one. Instead of getting my Desert Wocky plush back, I had a meerkat plush instead. It was even boxed in light red like one one of the admin posts. I wanted to thank R, but I didn't want to do it publicly because everyone would know I got special treatment, so I was trying to figure out how to get the message to her via Skype!

There must have been a time slip or something because the world was treating genetics like it was a brand new thing. The news was featuring a story about some kids whose mom was known, but their likeliness resembled a known figure so well that it could be concluded that the guy was the father. (And he was, not that he denied it. It was just a simple deduction problem.) The next thing they wanted to do was to see if the children behaved similarly to the father (whose personality was also known), so they were brought to this school yard.

The 5-6 kids were walking in a straight line and this black child, Nigel, was leading them (Admittedly I can't tell if the other children were of the same color). He started to lead them past these two kids who were playing on the school grounds, who suddenly forcefully shoved Nigel, shouting, "You're in our group!" They then bolted for it. Nigel, who confused and really did think the boys were part of his "family" group started chasing after them, shouting out in the cute cry children do, "Wait! You're in my group!" (As in, he wanted them to follow him like the rest of his siblings were).

"Nigel! No! They're not in your group!" I shouted, and as if I came from thin air, I started bolting after Nigel, but I pass this tree and I feel something wet. "Crap," I think, "It's probably bird crap." As I continue running I check with my left hand the area where I felt a wet spot to see if there was anything white. ... I always seem to check if something wet hits me if it's white. In any case, I finally caught up to Nigel and take his hand (with my right) and tell him gently, "They're not in your group." I start leading Nigel back to the rest of his siblings, and I see some big piece of paper on the ground and pick it up. I used it to white the back of my head to check and make sure it really wasn't bird crap on me. It probably wasn't, because when I looked at the paper I wiped my head with, it was orange.
bird crap

Posted at 06:18 am by Hikarii
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Jul 3, 2012
Murder!! in a dream

I woke up from a dream where I was getting murdered! @_@;;

I entered something that looked like a war planning/discussion/meeting room. In fact, there was an essence of a Suikoden-like feel when I sat down. I knew I wasn't supposed to be with there with those people, because they were apparently the enemy and I didn't even have a disguise on.

As the meeting started I could see everyone sort of have a concealed gun, and the person that was about to speak, the important guy, was talking in a business-like manner. I was got really nervous looking around because everyone having guns was scary! I had this horrible thought that wondered, "What if they shot me?!"

Not too soon after wondering that, the big important guy finishes his short debrief and reveals his own gun AND SHOOTS ME IN THE RIGHT ARM. I felt this searing pain and as I was screaming, I reached over to the wound with my left arm to try and apply pressure to lessen the bleeding, because I didn't want to die (Even though it's inevitable that they ALL could have shot and killed me right then and there).

All this time while I'm screaming on the floor, the head honcho keeps talking and goes on about how "to really kill 'em, you can also administer a dosage of L" since pairing a bullet wound with this L was a surefire death. I'm lying on the floor, still grabbing onto my arm to apply pressure and stop the bleeding as I hear this and I become INCREDIBLY fearful because I didn't want L injected into me! I could really feel my arm pulsating and my breath shortening, but I must have known it was a dream because I was telling myself, "WAKE UP BIANCA!! COURTNEY SAID WHEN YOU DIE IN YOUR DREAMS YOU DIE IN REAL LIFE TOO."

But a part of me wanted to see if that was true, so I continued to lie there, feeling the brink of death draw near. It didn't take long for me to change my mind, because I didn't want to take the chance, and I was too chicken to find out (I didn't know if I was going to be shot at again or be given "L"! I was also in incredible pain in my dream so I just woke up to end it all.

Posted at 07:12 am by Hikarii
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Apr 12, 2010
Dream comics~

This one was from last night. For some reason, I was driving Jeremy around.

This one was from last week, but hey!

I had a dream that my sister and I attended a Tsubacon and Tomo got to touch him. I was just sitting there THINKING in my DREAM, telling myself I didn't NEED to touch him. It was a creepy thing to do, I thought, but I regretted it when I told Tomo about this, with her response being "WHOOOO". I expected her to be weirded out. o_o

He was shirtless, too.

Not even in my dreams, I get to touch Tsubasa. DAMN MY RAAAAIIIFUUUU.

I'm kidding. It was a funny dream though.

Posted at 06:01 pm by Hikarii
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Jan 27, 2010

The other night I had a dream that there was something like an event going on at the MH Cinelux Theatre.

Domoto Koichi was there, and so was I. Everyone was gonna watch Ninja Assassin. I don't know where Tomo was, but why WOULDN'T she be there? She has to tell Koichi she saw KAT-TUN. )=

Okay, so the Koichi in my dream didn't REALLY say "No, with me!" OR have a glass of champagne. But he might as well be, otherwise, that star-like aura wouldn't exist.

I swear, I knew it was a dream halfway, too. I was even thinking "This better not be a dream." Silly me, the fact that Koichi's speaking English in your dream is already far from realty. Bolol.

Posted at 04:26 pm by Hikarii
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Nov 16, 2009
I hate it when I have dreams where I have a scary family member.

For some reason, this dream had a mix of RPG elements that made totally no sense. But dreams hardly make sense anyway.

It starts off in the morning, where I hear news of some murderer gay rapist on TV. They haven't identified him yet, but they tell everyone to be on the lookout. I'm eating breakfast with my dad, and I play the usual game of where I simulate a scenario and ask what he would do. Today, I asked him that if I had a stalker on my tail, what should I do? He answers that I should tell him right away. It was such a typical answer, but I guess I felt reassured anyway.

That evening, headed towards a school that I magically got to relocate using a similar redecorating feature as in Country Story. I watched a few children who were preschool to Kindergarten level play around in class, but I only really noticed three of them. Two were a boy and girl wearing paper mache or plaster masks the boy had bought them. The girl's mask kind of lost its purpose by looking kind of like the girl's face. I noticed a boy sitting in the last row in the back of the room in front of me (I was standing at the back) seemed pretty dreary. I asked if he wanted a mask, too. At this point, the teacher told me that this ilttle boy had problems with his father. His father did inappropriate things to him.

At that point I didn't think about the rapist on TV yet. I tell the boy if he can "log off, delete this character, and make a new one" (remember, there were strange RPG elements that sort of made sense in-dream!), but then realized his father would see him playinig anyway and get his new "in game name" from there. Then i told the teacher that if the boy was getting abused, if we could prove it, we could prevent the boy from going back to his father. To which at that point the teacher replies, "We can't right now. The ______ is already on his way here." (I forgot what she said, but it was a good adjective for describing somebody scary.)

Everyone in the classrom starts taking cover, probably because a scary father who gets his own son is on the way. I hide under a blanket in the closet myself. I think we should have ran, but the father comes tumbling in. throwing teh door back andimmediately heading straight for his son. I think he started beating him, or something like that, because I mentioned something out loud to the kid that maybe, to end his misery, death might be a better possibility. wtf was I saying?! I was basically telling the kid that dying was better in his case! I should've been more protective and reliable in my "teacher's assistant" position! Maybe "dying" didn't have as big of an impact because of the said "RPG" element, but that still wasn't right. I suspect the reason why I said that in this dream was because I wanted to throw away responsiblity when I found myself helpless.

The boy's father, upon hearing me, heads towards my hiding place. I remain silent, but then he started to kick me, taking half my "HP bar". I don't react, thinking he'll stop there, but he starts kicking me again. I start to ingest potions and attack back. My attacks are not as strong, but I had a lotof potions so I managed to take down his HP to 7. I then got a message that the man won the battle, but I managed to get his HP downt o 7. This is SUCH a strange RPG element.

Anyway, the father leaves with his kid. I think my dad arrived to take me somewhere I wantred to go. It might be at this point where it was revealed, somehow, that my DAD was the gay rapist and not the boy's father. That news shocked me, and I planned to ask my dad about it later. As I follow my dad out of the white building, him as calmly as ever, I got incredibly nervous about asking. But since his back was to me, I asked anyway. "Daddy, I heard you were the gay rapist."

I didn't have to ask if it was true. He turns around, makes this HIDEOUS and HORRENDOUS smile that scared the bejeebies out of me. He didn't question where I got the information. I think it was so scary I didn't even ask if it was a joke. We got into the car (for some reason I was still going along), and he turned around and made that face still. I was scared and incredibly confused. Where had the father I known gone? He kept that face until he dropped me off as my destination, where I took one last look at his creepy face before running off into the mall (probably my destination).

I must have been so shocked I whipped out my cellphone to call Alice (Who I DON'T have the cellphone number from) to tell her about why I suddenly started feeling incredibly depressed. I start by teling her what I just found out about my dad, and how I felt horrible because this morning I had unknowingly asked him a question about what I should do if there was a scary man on my tail-- and it turns out the scary man I feared was him! But at the time what he told me sounded so typical of him, and now his personality was totally different. It was like I never knew my dad.

Then I told her I was torn about what to do. On one hand I still wanted to talk to my dad, because even if he is the way he is now, the kind of person he had been to me before was my dad. Very kind and such. But now that I'm aware he's dangerous, what should I do? I felt like I lost somebody more important than a best friend. Yes, a family member, but it shared a similar feeling. I also felt like I never really knew my dad at this point. I woke up before I could make a decision.

It seems funny and unrealistic now, but all dreams are. It was a horrific experience when it happened. So much that upon waking up, I thought about asking my father if he was gay, but had second thoughts about it because I was afraid that my dream might have been true.

Posted at 07:17 am by Hikarii
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Mar 21, 2009
Because the last entry wasn't enough.

I thought putting it in comic form would make more sense.

It didn't.

Posted at 10:05 pm by Hikarii
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Mar 20, 2009
A series of dreams in one night =/

Well, I can't remember all of them. First one, my family was in Reno. It was the typical kind of visit there we normally have, except it was past midnight and we were all in some hotel room (that wasn't very well furnished). So Tomo asks Mom and Dad if we can go somewhere (I can't remember where, but it was a place we normally go to), and Mom and Dad ask her what makes her think we can go there. Tomo comes up with some lame (but understandable) reason that every time we come over to Reno and stay overnight, we ALWAYS go there. How she asked it went something like,

"Hey, hey. Can we go to _____?"
"What makes you think we can go there?"
"Because we're staying overnight. And we always go when we stay overnightin Reno!"


I think this one is still a derivative of that last dream, but for some reason, my aunt and cousins were here with us. Because it was past midnight, we were going to try and sleep. Even though we were in Reno, I had my own bed from home, but I couldn't sleep because I was uncomfortable. So I get up and throw off my sheets, only to find  lots of balloons in my bed. I don't think they were filled with air, because they weren't as light, but I don't think they were filled with water, either. I concluded it must be dense air. Or heavy air.

So while my little cousins are screaming all excitedly because of the colorful balloons, I was trying to hurry and get them out so I could go back to sleep because I was soooo tired. At the same time, I was also trying to get everyone to shush because it was so late.

Then for some reason, I think I might have given up, because I sat down on the couch with a laptop, and little Thomas sits up next to me. The other cousins are playing with the balloons. Because it's late, I tell everyone to quiet down. I also pretend to sleep, which I don't know if it works or not, because I think the kids believe me and then go to sleep.


So, I was on a Wednesday schedule at school, (it must be, because I had a break long enough to meet up with my dad for lunch) and I was about to head back to school after saying good-bye to my dad. It's strange that we'd do that without eating, but maybe we ate already. Or maybe he ate without me. It had to be that, because as I was driving back to school, I was so hungry I decided to stop by Taco Bell to eat.

So I pull into Taco Bell, but the road is completely different from what I KNOW the Taco Bell near my school is like, even though Ii've never been there. In any case, I walk in the taco Bell, and it's huuuge. Well, only as big as the food court junctioni n a typical mall. Okay, cool. So it was a mall.

The Taco Bell was really crowded, though. There was a looong horizontal counter and an even longer line. I didn't know what I wanted to order, since I don't eat at Taco Bell too often, so I let some girls go ahead of me as I tried to look at the menu. For some reason, I could NOT find the menu. It should be there when you look above the counter, right? But whenever I looked up, I saw nothing, or I couldn't read them. As I look for the menu, I see Tsubasa Imai working as a cashier at the Taco Bell. Thinking back now, I wasn't half as bewildered as I am right now, because, uh, what a lowly job for him? And right then, I don't think I paid too much attention to HOW he got there. Heck, I wasn't paying too much attention becauseI was looking for the (*$@($ MENU AND I WAS SO THIRSTY I COULDN'T FIND THE MEAL THAT WOULD PROVIDE ME WITH A DRINK. It seemed every item on the menu didn't come with a drink, which is bizarre, too!

I was so embarrassed I couldn't find it, and I was sure I'd eventually find it so I let some more girls go haead of me and I began to walk around the area to get a better view of the menu, all the while looking up. I was scared about seeing Tsubasa, but I thought about talking to him, but it wouldn't work 'cause he probably didn't speak English. (Also why I was wondering what he was doing with this job if he couldn't.. I'm dead sure this wasn't a Japanese Taco Bell.) I don't know if I really talked to him in my dream, or maybe it was an imaginative thing WITHIBN my dream, because I kind of imagined how the conversation would go. And the topic I was thinking about talking to him would be about his hair. And how I didn't like that. But as I'm thinking about it WITHIN my dream, I realized I didn't know how to say I didn't like his hair.

And then I walk over to where people were getting soda (That part just suddenly appeared!) and I talk to some old Asian man.

Then my dream jsut ended there. I never quenched my thirst and I'm pissed!

My speculation on why I had this dream is because 1) Last Wednesday, I did have lunch with my dad, and I did part with him to go back to school. 2) He mentioned we'd have Taco Bell next time, and told me to make sure I know how to get there. I don't know why Tsubasa was there. o_o Maybe 'cause I was looking at pictures of his mullet lately. XDD

Posted at 09:18 am by Hikarii
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Feb 15, 2009

So, like, we were in a mall that was apparently Eastridge. Just Dad, Tomo and me were there and I don't know where our mom was. But for some reason, there was a field trip/tour thing that Tomo and I were a part of, so we followed the group for awhile as the leader/teacher (he was a little chubby and had a beard) Apparently, I had been on the tour before (I went on it the time slot before this time with Tomo), so when we reached the open area of the mall where there was a giant screen and rows of chairs, I immediately went to find a seat in the front row. (I like seats close to the front). The familiar rock music that had been blaring all this time suddenly ended.

Also, as we were standing in line and following the leader guy, I was talking to some really jerky kids I've seen before at church. They didn't recognize me as their teacher, which was all right, I thought, otherwise they would have torn me to shreds or something.

Anyway, so while we were at this "mall theater" with no "lights out", the leader guy says something about how we came a little late, so he'll start that video with the rock music again. In the meantime, we were supposed to pick seats.  I didn't know what seat I wanted to pick, but I didn't want to pick the same one I had sat in during the tour before. For some reason, I see Andy up ahead in one of the front rows. I sat some rows behind him, but then decided I would head back a few rows more. So I get up to move, and at that moment, Andy had switched seats. I think he moved three rows back, but it was still two-three rows off from where I had been seating until I decided to move. (This "theater" had TONS of rows).

I'm heading further and further back, and I see these seats where shorts stairs need to be climbed to be accessed, but I don't think about sitting in them yet. I pick a seat 3-5 rows away from those elevated seats and sit down in an area where I can still see the screen. That's when I see Tomo and her friend, Josie, heading up the stairs to sit in those seats. I call out to Tomo, saying,

"Tomo! Are you going to sit in those seats? (Duh she is)"
She nods in reply. Or answers yes. I can't remember.
"I was thinking about sitting there, but I don't know how to get there."

They ignore me at that part. Tomo asks Josie how they are going to get up there, since the stairs were so far off (wtf? You were just climbing them. They were mysteriously on the same floor I was now). Josie explains to her they have to climb on the round things attached to the wall. (They looked like clocks, and one was a decoration. Tomo answers that the first two she sees do look like steps, but where was the third? Josie says it's that red and orange circle thing, and that she didn't know it was a step before.

Now here comes the most bizzare part. Josie jumps on those two steps like normal, and on the third, somehow she turns herself upside downand latches her shoelaces on that circle thing, and suddenly she is liftedup and spinning around the circle clockwise. I don't know how that's possible because the space between the other two circles was not very far. Josie spins around it for a few good rounds, then she jumps onto the floor above where the seats are, safe and sound like it was nothing.

I'm obviously shocked and surprised she made it okay, and am taken by surprise that Tomo's going to try it to. She passes the first two steps easy by jumping on them, and latches herself onto that last tricky one Josie did, but she's going in the opposite direction Josie was-- counterclockwise. That made it easier for her to jump on the second floor, so she does. So, I tell Tomo and Josie I'll head up to the second floor after them, but I'm particularly afraid of the way they went (I'M NOT GOING TO JUMP OVER AN OPEN GAP LIKE THAT WHEN WE'RE ALREADY ON THE SECOND FLOOR OF THE MALL.) so I look around for an alternative way. I see a small bridge (mall material) leading into the floor Tomo and Josie on, and am immediately relieved that there was an easier way to get up there after all. I'd better hurry before the movie starts. And the great news is that the bridge was only a few ways back from where I came from.

I start running back, but I can't seem to find where that bridge it. Its easy accessibility seemed to have disappeared from me as I was running to look for it and I take the next left where I believed the bridge would be. I see this small crawlspace, though, and there's a rolling platform like the kinds you put your grocery on at the grocery store when you're next in line to the cashier. I misjudge the direction it's rolling, and I get on (I had to wait for some people to roll past me before I could, since I was trying to get on from the side rather than the end), only to find myself rolling back to where I had tried to get on this platform. The rolling platform was short in width, though, so I could spread my arms out and wrap my hands around the sides of it as I crawl across to go in the direction I want to go. I knew I had to hurry before other people needed to use it to get across to the side I was on.

All this was happening and I was trying my hardest not to look down, because we were on the second floor of the mall and it was quite some ways from the floor. I was scared, but I didn't look down yet for the fear to really strike in. I'm crawling across, but the power of the platform is increasing. Thankfully, I see something to grab on up ahead, so I keep crawling for a bit until I reach it.. and it turns out to be a dead end! Angry at my fruitless exploration bit there, I grab onto that hold to rest a bit while I thought how to get back. By this time I was really worried I might not make it back to the movie in time. I didn't hear the rock music playing yet, but I heard something else. I heard Josie saying something. I can't remember what it is, but I can clearly remember what she and my sister said next.

Josie said, "Look at all those escalators."
My sister was the one who immediately broke out into a scream,

Josie joined her, and they both started screaming at the top of their lungs,

I groan to myself, because they're being loud and obnoxious, and I'm embarrassed of the stares they might receive. For some reason, this even if familiar to me, probably because Tomo had told me she had gotten busted by the librarian before for yelling at someone outside the building. In any case, I start making my way back. I let go of the things I'm holding onto, and let the rolling platform guide me to the end. When I get off, though, I'm in a completely different area of the mall. I try to run around to find my way back by identifying the stores I knew were nearby when I was in that other area, but I still seem to be lost. All the while, I could still hear my sister and her friend chanting every other 10 seconds,


Then I find my Dad, who tells me Tomo was yelling something and annoying everyone else in the mall. I already know if it, of course, but I was somewhat concerned that my sister wasn't aware of the nuisance she was being, and would find out too late once some mall authority tells her to can it. Dad tells me to go find Tomo, but I tell him I don't know where she is, but I go off to look for her anyway, thankful I still I had my phone in case I got lost in the process.

The last thing I heard before I woke up was just that,


Even after I woke up, I still heard it in my mind.


What the hell, man?


Posted at 07:28 am by Hikarii
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